Mindfulness Matters Newsletter

Erica Rayner-Horn M.A.

May 2011



If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am only for myself, what am I? 




        Spring has finally come to the Northwest and cherry blossoms are in bloom and new green shoots are bursting from the saturated ground. I hope you are enjoying Spring- wherever you are!  

   In this issue we explore Self-Compassion, and below you will find details of upcoming mindfulness events. Enjoy!



Mark your calendar!




Saturday May 14


Cancer Lifeline



Discover powerful ways to manage stress, recognize tension building up and learn how to intervene with simple, effective steps to feel more relaxed, balanced and calm.


Free for cancer patients,

family & friends.





Wednesday, June 1

Lymphoma Support Group

Evergreen Hospital


Lymphoma patients

support group

call for registration.


For updates of Mindfulness Events


Free Newsletter Mindfulness Matters


You can sign up at my website





for Self-Compassion




Kristin Neff


"Drawing on a powerful blend of Western psychology and Eastern meditative strategies, Kristin Neff offers practical, wise guidance on the path of emotional healing and deep inner transformation." -

Tara Brach, Ph.D., author of Radical Acceptance


" This book and its courageous and compassionate author will become essential reading for all of us seeking inner peace and true, lasting happiness in our lives. Savor and enjoy!" --

Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., author of Mindsight


Self- Compassion Website

click here


The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion


Christopher Germer


 "This wise and eloquent book illuminates the power of self-compassion and offers creative, scientifically grounded strategies for putting it into action. You'll master practical techniques for living more fully in the present moment—especially when hard-to-bear emotions arise—and for being kind to yourself when you need it the most."


Reviews of The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion

click here

Mindfulness & Self-Compassion 


     When we think of the word compassion, it tends to imply feeling the suffering of others and responding with kindness and empathy. We rarely consider being compassionate toward ourselves. Why is it so much easier to be kind to others than ourselves?


    In fact,  if we are honest we might realize how unkind, critical and judgmental we actually are towards ourselves. It can be suprising to discover an inner voice that is constantly negative, disapproving and judging, telling us we will never succeed, or we are just not attractive or intelligent enough. It can be hard to see how we sabotage ourselves.


A new area of reserach is examining this and finding...


"People who score high on tests of self-compassion have less depression and anxiety, and tend to be happier and more optimistic" - says Parker-Pope,  N.Y. Times 2/28/11


Spiritual teachings of all persuasions have for centuries pointed to the fact that the root of compassion lies in developing a forgiving, considerate attitude to oneself.


"Self-compassion is the first step

to being compassionate to others." Dalai Lama



      So how does Mindfulness help us cultivate true kindness and compassion to ourselves ?


   1. Acknowledging our Critical, Judgmental Voice.    

            Begin by paying attention and just hearing your inner dialogue- noticing if you are harsh and critical to yourself, judging yourself as not good enough, or pushing away painful feelings. Just notice this without judging it- you are not alone in being hard on yourself!


        2. Acknowledging our Difficult Emotions.

        Allow yourself to be aware of your true feelings when you are hurt, sad or lonley. We are so accustomed to denying and avoiding pain that we don't see that this acutually increases our  suffering. Just gently acknowledge how you feel right now and let your feelings be held in loving awareness.


     3. Mindful Self-Compassion Practice

             In mindfulness practice, we pay attention to our experience-just the way it is-from moment to moment. We become aware of our thoughts and feelings, positive or negative, without suppressing them or pushing them away.  We soften our hearts and acknowledge difficult feelings.

Not trying to fix anything, just recognizing this is how we feel in this moment,we learn to respond compassionately to ourselves.


        The Paradox- practicing self-compassion teaches us that when we resist and deny our suffering we make it worse! When we turn towards our difficult emotions and judgmental minds with an open heart we invite healing and equanimity.


Take the Test- How Self-Compassionate are you?

click here to find out




Go Easy on Yourself, a New Wave of Research Urges

N.Y. Times Article

link to article


Mindfulness -Based

Stress Reduction Class

September 28-November 16

Wednesdays -6.30- 8.30 p.m.



Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction teaches effective tools for managing stress and cultivating relaxed awareness.This MBSR class is based on John Kabat-Zinn’s renowned program that thousands have found helpful in relieving psychological and physical symptoms, and improving overall health and wellbeing.


Participants report better coping and communication skills, less reactivity, improved relationships, and a more balanced life.


LOCATION-   M’Illumino Studio, Seattle


Class Includes: 8 classes, Day of Mindfulness, Workkbook,

Handouts & 3 Mindfulness Practice CDs



Register early- classes fill!



Ready to start your

Mindfulness Meditation practice?


Finding Tranquility-

Guided Mindfulness Meditations for Stressful Times

availbale at

Seattle- East West Bookshop

Whidbey -Moonraker- Star Basics


Mindful Therapy

Erica Rayner-Horn M.A.

1800 Westlake Ave N.# 304

Seattle, WA 98109

206- 973- 7371




Copyright 2011.